


Escaping the Noise

by LB0917



Category: Pentatonix
Genre: Anxiety, Diagnosis, Illness, M/M, Previous Scomarson, Scomark, sick!scott, some doctors aren't terribly nice or helpful
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-15 12:34:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28813521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LB0917/pseuds/LB0917
Summary: A mysterious illness is affecting Scott's ability to sing, perform, or to live his life normally at all. The group is scared, and his boyfriend might lose his mind along with him. Everything is in a state of uncertainty, and if there is one thing that Scott isn't good at, it's not being in control.
Relationships: Scott Hoying/Mark Manio
Kudos: 7





	1. Sleep(less)

_Author's Note: Yeah, another one, because I can't stop writing. :) Thank you to everyone who is here because they read another one of my stories and want to keep on going! And for anyone new, hello!_  
  
This one was very different to write, because the illness depicted in this story comes from my personal experience. Some of the interactions and episodes were things that I've experienced, so I reimagined them slightly to fit Scott. The interactions with doctors are based on a true story, as are emotional responses, etc. I hope you like it! Who doesn't love a good medical mystery, ammirite?!

**Chapter 1: Sleep(less)**

“Angel?” Mark asked, placing his arms around his boyfriend where he stood at the sink, rinsing dishes.

Scott jumped at the contact, which was utterly confusing.

Particularly so, because Mark had been calling his name from the living room for the past two minutes.

“Sorry, babe. I’ve been trying to talk to you. Did you not hear me?”

Scott turned the faucet off and turned to him, looking overwhelmed. Mark was instantly nervous.

“I’m going to rip my own ear off, I think,” Scott muttered.

Scott looked like he might be losing his mind. His eyes were wide and wild looking, and his hair was disheveled in a tangled mess on the top of his head.

“What’s going on, baby?” Mark asked, holding onto Scott as he was clearly unraveling.

“My ear. It’s just… its ringing, constantly. It won’t shut up. I think I might be going insane.”

Scott looked like he might cry.

“Does it hurt?” Mark asked, quietly.

“WHAT?” Scott asked, and Mark wondered if he was being comically dramatic. Judging by the lack of a knowing smirk attached to the reply, Mark assumed that he was serious.

“I said,” Mark replied, pausing to kiss Scott’s other ear, “does it hurt?”

Scott shook his head, exasperatedly. “It doesn’t hurt, it just feels clogged, but it won’t stop, and I want to jam a kitchen knife into my ear canal, I swear to God…”

Scott rubbed his left ear, aggressively.

“When did it start doing that?”

“Last night. I couldn’t sleep. I just laid there, staring at the ceiling and slowly losing my mind.”

Mark looked at his boyfriend’s face. He could tell that he hadn’t slept. His eyes were red-rimmed and there were dark circles beneath them.

“You must have an ear infection or something. Maybe you’re sick.”

“Must be…” Scott replied, appearing to mentally be somewhere else, entirely.

“Let’s get you a doctor’s appointment. We have to get you better before tour, after all.”

Scott nodded, still tugging absently on his earlobe.

Mark needed to make sure this was fixed quickly, before the poor man lost his mind.

“It’s probably a sinus infection,” the doctor muttered, peering into Scott’s ear with his otoscope. “Yeah… it doesn’t look bad… just some fluid in there, a very little bit. Let’s put you on some antibiotics.”

Scott nodded, taking the script from the doctor and muttering his thanks.

“I know, tinnitus can be deafening sometimes. We’ll get you right as rain in no time. Okay?”

“Tinnitus?”

“That’s the ringing in the ear that you’re complaining of,” the doctor replied, appearing to be slightly bored. Mark wanted to slap him for his lack of empathy.

They left the office hand-in-hand, and Mark gave Scott’s palm a quick kiss. “You’ll feel better in no time. Can you get through rehearsals with a clogged ear?”

Scott nodded, though he appeared to be unsure.

As it turned out, rehearsals with said clogged ear would prove to be extremely difficult.

He hadn’t told the rest of the group about his stupid ear. It didn’t seem to be worth mentioning, as they each took their place on stage.

He was a bit dizzyby the end of the run-through, to say the least.

His in-ears were extremely annoying. He could only hear out of one of them, while the other one was drowned out by the sound of rushing water.

Kevin’s beatboxing echoed in his brain like a gong being struck in a cave. It was a sound that should be used for torture. Of that, Scott was sure.

Choreography was proving to be difficult as well. He hadn’t realized just how off-balance he was, until he tried to turn quickly, and nearly fell flat on his face.

It took his brain a moment to catch up with his body, and he wavered on his feet.

“Grab him,” Matt called suddenly, and Kevin leaned forward to steady Scott by the arm.

The group froze in place, silently, as Kevin stared at Scott with an alarmed look, gripping him tightly by the bicep.

“Scott…”

“What?” Scott snapped, his eyes clenched shut.

“Are you… are you drunk?”

Scott looked up into the eyes of his best friends. Kirstie looked like she might cry. Mitch looked like he was about to start yelling at him, and Matt’s eyes were simply filled with pity.

_Oh, fuck that._

“Drunk?” It was all that Scott could think to say.

“You’ve sounded flat for this whole set, which everyone knows is _not_ like you at all. You keep clenching your eyes shut, and you’ve been off-balance. Not to mention the fact that you almost just fell flat on your face,” Kevin listed, gently, but his tone was full of judgement.

“Not feeling so well,” Scott offered, closing his eyes again. His frustration was creeping up, and he took a deep breath before he snapped.

But the goddamn _noise_ that was echoing in his goddamn _brain…_

_Is this how people go insane?_

He didn’t even know that he did it, but suddenly he was on the floor, curled up in a ball, sitting with his forehead pressed against his knees.

And apparently, he had just screamed.

A guttural, angry scream, that took everyone by surprise.

He could hear Kirstie crying, now.

For some reason, that made him angrier.

When had he started tugging at his own hair? He had no idea.

He must have looked absolutely _mental._

But it had been five days now, and this damn noise wasn’t going away.

The antibiotics clearly weren’t working.

He felt a hand on his shoulder.

It was a small, gentle hand.

Only one of them would have approached him like this, in this state. He knew that the rest of them were frozen in fear, watching him unravel.

“Stephanie… what can I do to help you…?” Mitch asked softly, his voice nearly a whisper.

Scott’s frustration increased tenfold when he registered that the voice was so soft, he could hardly hear it over the sound of _fucking Niagara Falls_ in his ear drum.

“I just need a minute…” Scott muttered, rising to his feet abruptly. He staggered from the quick movement, and Kevin’s eyes narrowed with further judgement.

Scott needed more than a minute. He needed a hacksaw. Straight to the ear. Just call him the Van Gogh of pop music.

“Has anyone talked to Scott in the past few weeks?” Kevin asked, as Scott beelined from the room for his “minute”.

The other three looked at each other with guilty eyes. Admittedly, the group had had quite a bit going on recently, and contact with one another had dipped on their list of priorities.

But Scott was always so happy, so he was the least of their worries.

“Maybe I’ll call Mark.”

“What if Mark is the problem?” Matt asked.

Kevin let this thought sink in. What if they were having problems, and Scott was mitigating a broken heart with alcohol? If that were the case, Kevin would feel extremely guilty for his approach. His heart sank for his friend, knowing what his boyfriend meant to him.

“Mitch, you haven’t heard if anything is wrong?”

Mitch shrugged, sadly. “He had a cold last week. I didn’t think it was front-page news.”

Scott returned to them then, and it registered with each of them just how tired he looked. They were unsure how they had overlooked this fact.

“I”m sorry,” Scott muttered, flushing slightly with embarrassment. “I’m not drunk, though. I promise.”

Kevin’s eyes softened. “What’s going on, bud? You’re freaking us out.”

“It’s stupid. I have… I have an infection, I think. Sinus infection, or an ear infection or something…” Scott’s thoughts were scattered as he spoke. “It’s affecting my left ear. I have this ringing that won’t go away, and everything else is muffled and it’s downright maddening. I can’t fully hear myself sing, or even hear myself _think_ … and it’s affecting my balance now, I guess.”

The rest of them found themselves smiling.

“Thank God, Scott,” Kirstie sighed. “I thought something was horribly wrong with you.”

Scott’s eyes narrowed. He didn’t appreciate the situation being taken lightly. He was being driven insane, for crying out loud.

He decided not to get into that. “I’m on antibiotics, so I should be fully recovered by the time we start touring.”

Matt reached out a hand, clapping him on the back. “Happy to hear that it’s just an infection.”

Scott refrained from rolling his eyes.

Mark crawled into bed that night, cautiously eyeing his boyfriend, who was staring at the ceiling. 

“How are you feeling?” Mark whispered. He frowned when Scott didn’t acknowledge his question at all.

“Babe?” he asked, making sure to make his voice louder.

Scott looked at him instantly.

He _really_ couldn’t hear well.

Mark scooted closer to him in the bed, resting his chin on his boyfriend’s chest. “How are you feeling?” he repeated.

Scott absently played with Mark’s hair. “Like I would rather be deaf than have to hear this ringing anymore.”

“Just let the antibiotics take their course. You have five more days in the cycle, right?”

Scott nodded. “Shouldn’t it be getting better by now?”

Mark reached up to Scott’s ear, tugging lightly on his ear lobe. “You’re extremely stubborn, angel. It doesn’t surprise me in the slightest that your body parts are the same way.”

Scott laughed, and Mark realized that he was pretty sure it was the first time he heard that sound in days.

“I looked it up. It says that you should lay on your other side when you sleep. Maybe that will help.”

Scott nodded. “Okay.”

Mark didn’t miss the sound of his boyfriend’s voice breaking. He sat up and leaned over him, cupping his cheek in his hand.

“Whatever you’re feeling is okay.”

Scott looked at him like he was falling in love with him all over again.

“You’re scared that you’ll never know what silence is again. That’s terrifying. Scott, I can’t imagine that. Especially as a singer… not being able to hear properly. What you’re feeling is completely valid. Please know that. But my love, please also know that we will fix it, okay?”

Scott pulled the smaller man towards his chest, wrapping him up tightly and placing a kiss to the top of his head.

All he had needed was validation. He thanked God that he loved someone who could give it to him.

And for a split second, he forgot about the ringing noise.

_Author's Note: Let me know what you think!! I've got a few chapters ready to go so far. Wanted to see if anyone liked it first before I went nuts as usual. :)_


	2. (Painful) Encore

Scott popped the last of the antibiotic pills, reflexively rolling his eyes.

There had been one day, two days ago, where Scott had thought he was out of the woods.

There had still been pressure in his ear, but he was relieved to find that the incessant ringing had stopped.

Rehearsal had gone fantastically that day. He felt like he was finally back.

But then, the next morning, he woke up to the torturous sound again.

Mark held him as he cried, not bothering to ask why. He simply knew that Scott was tired, feeling helpless.

They returned to the doctor later that day.

"It's still happening. My ear is clogged, my balance is off, and the tinnitus hasn't stopped."

He couldn't keep the tone of aggravation from seeping from his voice.

The doctor peered into his ear again. "Well, the fluid is gone. Your ear looks healthy."

Scott stared blankly at the man.

"Some people simply get chronic tinnitus."

Mark's eyes narrowed. He would not accept this.

"What can we do for it?" Mark asked with an edge to his voice.

The doctor put his tools away. "Unfortunately, not a lot. A lot of people find that they get used to it."

Mark watched as Scott's eyes welled with tears. He grabbed his hand, pulling him off of the table and leaving, wordlessly.

"We're gonna get a second opinion."

Scott sighed. "It'll have to wait until after tour, now. I wasted too much time thinking it was a stupid infection."

Watching Scott look this dejected made Mark want to storm back in and demand that someone else look at him.

He settled for cuddling him nearly to death as soon as they returned home.

It was show number six when the stakes became a bit higher.

Mark hadn't joined them for this leg of tour. He had just begun with a new modeling agency, and leaving so abruptly wouldn't look good in their eyes.

Not having Mark with him made Scott feel even worse. It had been two weeks without him, and with the tinnitus on top of that, Scott was feeling more horrible than ever.

His friends were becoming increasingly nervous about his mental state. He was becoming irritable, and snapped at them frequently. Mitch had tried to put him in his place a few times, but it fell on deaf ears.

No, that was not meant to be funny.

It was the encore of the night when it happened. Specifically, Mitch was singing his verse of 'Hallelujah'. Scott closed his eyes, enjoying the sound of his friend's hauntingly beautiful voice, when it happened.

Scott felt a building pressure in his left ear, like a water balloon that was being overfilled.

And then, he heard a pop.

And suddenly, he felt like he was on a tilt-a-whirl at the county fair.

He felt himself start to panic, and clenched his eyes shut to stop the spinning sensation.

Bad idea. That made it so much worse.

He opened them. Nope, that was definitely worse. He shut them again.

He belted out the final words to the song, praying that he could hold it together. His own voice rang through his head, making him nauseous.

As soon as the song ended, he sprinted off the stage. As soon as he reached the wings, he fell to his knees.

"Help." He muttered, and a few stage hands rushed forward.

He felt a presence crouch down in front of him. Even the change in the shadows in front of his closed eyes sent a wave of nausea through him. "Scott... what's happening?" Matt's voice asked, softly.

"Spinning." Scott croaked out with his eyes still shut, unable to say anything further without being sick all over his friend.

"Let's get you to your dressing room," Kevin chimed in, reaching beneath Scott's armpits to help him to his feet.

"No, no no..." Scott begged, his voice bordering on hysterical. "No... can't move."

"Sounds like vertigo..." A stage hand muttered, crouching down and taking out his walkie talkie.

"I need the crew medic to stage left."

The next two minutes felt like years, as Scott mentally begged for everyone to be quiet. Their voices made it worse, somehow. Each time a voice rang in his ear, it felt like he was being spun upside down.

"Hey, Scott. It's Jeff," The medic finally whispered, crouching down in front of him. "Open your mouth. I'm gonna give you a tablet that's gonna dissolve, okay? Don't chew it."

Scott complied, desperate for relief. He didn't care if the man was poisoning him, at this point.

"I just need everyone to back up, and keep your voices down," Jeff said a moment later. "We're gonna wait about 15 minutes for this to kick in, and then we can move him to his dressing room. It's going to help with the nausea, alright? I have a doctor on the way."

Scott wondered how big his audience was right now. Suddenly he was overcome with embarrassment.

He could hear his friends breathing heavily in the silence. He knew he was scaring them. In any other instance, he would have been comforting them, assuring them that he was fine and that they were overreacting.

But he was so scared right now, he couldn't even think.

"Alright, Scott. Can you open your eyes for me and tell me if you still feel sick?'

Scott complied, and Jeff spun quickly in front of his eyes. He blinked rapidly, trying to focus on him. "Still spinning," he whispered.

Jeff nodded. "I know, bud. This is for the nausea. Can you move without feeling nauseous? We'll help you."

Scott blinked a few more times, then nodded.

Kevin and Matt moved forward, helping Scott to his feet. Scott staggered sideways, and Kevin placed an arm around his waist to keep him from falling over.

"We got you."

It startled Kevin when he realized that Scott couldn't walk in a straight line. He was convinced that if he were to let him go, he would be on his face in an instant.

He leaned against him, tripping every few steps, as Matt clung to Scott's other side, helping Kevin to guide him along.

They settled him down on the couch in his dressing room, and their hearts broke when they finally realized how pale and sweaty he was. His breathing was erratic and shallow, like he was having a panic attack.

The doctor arrived a few minutes later, and took Scott's vitals. He didn't seem to be remotely troubled by Scott's physical distress.

"Gotta try to take some deep breaths for me, okay? What you're experiencing is vertigo, and it'll pass soon. Alright? Now that you've taken the anti-nausea pill, I can give you something to stop the spinning."

He handed Scott a small pill and Mitch passed them a bottle of water.

"Vertigo can be scary, I know," the doctor soothed, and Scott felt embarrassed again. He didn't need to be patronized.

"Why did it happen?" Kevin asked, as Scott drank some more water.

The doctor looked into Scott's ears and nose, as well as his eyes, neglecting to answer Kevin's question right away.

Scott watched as Kevin clearly became impatient with the silence.

"Why did it happen?" Mitch's voice cut through the silence, his agitation not going unnoticed by the doctor.

"Could have been any number of reasons. I assume you have never had vertigo before, considering that this seems to be such a surprise to everyone?"

Scott shook his head, but regretted it immediately as the room took off in a quick spin with the movement.

"It could be something as simple as a cold that is affecting your inner ear."

Scott rolled his eyes. Another mistake. "I was put on antibiotics a few weeks ago. Sickness is all but ruled out."

The doctor raised a condescending eyebrow. "I thought you said this was your first time?"

Scott nodded. "With vertigo, yes, but I've had tinnitus for over a month."

"That would have been good to know," the doctor replied dryly, pulling out a script pad and jotting something down.

"Here is a prescription for meclizine. It's the generic name for the prescription-only version of Dramamine. You know, what people take for seasickness? It is the pill that I just gave you. It will stop vertigo... most of the time. But you can't drink alcohol or operate heavy machinery. No driving. It is known to cause significant drowsiness."

He wrote something else. "Here is another script. This one is for the anti-nausea pill that your medic gave to you. Take this first, when vertigo happens, and let it take its time to work. It will allow you to keep the meclizine down."

Scott nodded, taking the second sheet of paper. He was surprised when the doctor wrote something on a third page.

"Here. I'm recommending an MRI as soon as possible. Since you've been experiencing tinnitus and now vertigo, for over a month, it would be best to rule out some dangerous underlying conditions."

"Dangerous?" Kirstie asked, nervously.

"A brain tumor, or Multiple Sclerosis, for example," the doctor replied, returning his script pad to his pocket and standing up. "Any headaches?"

Scott's eyes widened, and he nodded. He had assumed they were related to the ear problem.

"Yeah, I recommend getting that MRI very soon. If shows can be put off, that would be best, but the meclizine should be able to get you through, if that isn't an option."

"It isn't an option," Scott interjected, and noticed an uneasy look on his bandmates' faces.

"Okay. If you don't have any further questions for me, I'll leave you to it. I recommend you get to bed shortly. That meclizine will make you very tired, very soon. Take care of yourself, okay?"

Scott could do nothing more than nod, feeling a lump form in his throat as Kirstie and Mitch sat down on either side of him.

"Maybe we should take the next few days off," Mitch whispered, rubbing circles on Scott's back.

The five of them were alone now, and Scott would have appreciated the quiet, if he could even hear it. But the ringing in his ear still wouldn't allow that.

Scott looked up into Kevin and Matt's eyes, and they shone with sympathy. He felt Kirstie's hand on his back, knowing very well that his friends wanted to do nothing but support him right now.

"No. We shouldn't do that," Scott sighed.

Kevin crouched down in front of him, placing a hand on his knee. "Let's see how you feel tomorrow. And let's get you that appointment. Okay?"

Scott nodded, feeling like everything was crashing down around him.


End file.
